


When it all falls apart

by LittleMoonStar



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-04
Updated: 2017-02-19
Packaged: 2018-09-22 01:50:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9576872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleMoonStar/pseuds/LittleMoonStar
Summary: Emma shrugged, “I didn’t have to think about anything when I was with him.  It was purely physical.  Things were going so well with Regina.  We were doing the whole family thing, dinners together almost every night, tucking the kid in together, hell, I was cooking breakfast for them on Sundays.  It was nice.  But then, I don’t know, the past couple of months’ things started getting a little…weird.”





	1. Chapter 1

The sand settled beneath her as she flopped down.  She pressed the bottle to her lips and let the liquid fill her mouth.  There was a satisfying burn as the amber liquid passed over the split in the bottom lip and then again as she swallowed.  It was a beautiful night, the air around the water cool enough to wear a hoodie, the sky was clear and the moon shone brightly from above.  This was the most at peace she had felt in days.  She stared out into the water, the replay of the past few weeks finally coming to a slow end in her head. _You really know how to mess things up, Swan,_ she thought.  The alcohol numbed the pain, both internal and external.  The bottle had just started its path back to her lips again when the shadow approached from out of the corner of her eye.  She passed it to the left as her best friend sank down beside her.  They sat in silence for a while, just passing the alcohol back and forth.

                “Wanna talk about it?” Ruby asked as she swallowed another mouthful.  Emma shrugged.  She wasn’t too sure that there really was anything to talk about.  She screwed up, and now this was the price she had to pay. 

                “How did you know I was here?”

                “It’s hard to call the sheriff when she’s starting the bar fights.  Surprisingly enough, it was Leroy who called me.  They said you walked out and headed in this direction.”  _Ironic, the town drunk calling for assistance._

                “I fucked up, Rubes.”  She twisted the lid back onto the bottle and let it fall between them. 

                “I heard.  I’d like to hear your side though.  Blowing up like that isn’t you.  What’s going on?”

Emma laid back, her arms folded behind her head.  “Everything just keeps falling apart.”

                “You mean your relationship with Killian?  You didn’t honestly expect that to work, did you?”  She rolled onto her side, her head cradled in her hand.  She licked at the wound on her lip, giving some thought to Ruby’s question.  

                “No,” she replied after several long minutes.  “It’s just --,”

                “Life.  Yeah, I get that,” Ruby interrupted, impatiently.  “Emma, you knew he wasn’t any good for you the first three times you dated him.  I went through hell trying to get my friend back after that last time.”

                “I know, I know.  We’re toxic together.”

                “Then why go back?”

Emma shrugged, “I didn’t have to think about anything when I was with him.  It was purely physical.  Things were going so well with Regina.  We were doing the whole family thing, dinners together almost every night, tucking the kid in together; hell, I was cooking breakfast for them on Sundays.  It was nice, something I’ve never had before.  But then, I don’t know, the past couple of months’ things started getting a little…weird.”

                “Define weird.”

                “I…last month, she told me she loved me.  Last week, she asked me to move in.  I mean I was already there most nights anyway, so it only made sense, but, I don’t know,” she rambled on for another couple of minutes before Ruby pulled her into a hug.

                “You chicken shit.  You’re so afraid that everyone is going to get a glimpse of one of your flaws that you run as far away from anyone who even shows a little bit of interest in you before they get a chance to see what a beautiful mess you really are.”   

                “When I saw him at the bar with that girl, I just…I lost my shit.  He sweet talked his way back into my bed, Ruby, and then a week later he’s at the bar with someone else.”

                “He’s a jerk, you knew that.”

                “How do I tell Regina?”  She grabbed the bottle from the sand and twisted the lid off.  “How do I tell her that just days after running out on her, I slept with my ex?”  She swallowed several times before pulling the bottle away.  “I always ruin everything.”

                “She loves you.  Yes, she might be a little hurt right now, but I think you guys can move passed this.  Go talk to her.” Ruby pushed herself to her feet, then held a hand out to help Emma up. 

                “Can you come with me?”

                “I’ll walk with you as far as Granny’s, then you’re on your own.”

###

She turned down Mifflin Street with her hands in her pockets.  Going to talk to Regina was a lot harder than it seemed, she couldn’t help but think of all the ways it would end badly.  She had stopped and turned around three times before she had made it that far.  Her back pocket began to vibrate, but she didn’t even have to look at it to know who it was.

                “Quit stalling, Swan,” Emma had barely hit the answer button and lifted the phone to her ear as Ruby's voice came through.

                “I thought I was on my own?”

                “You were until I saw you pass by the front window of the diner two times.”

                “What am I supposed to say, Ruby?  Hey, Regina, I know I ran when you asked me to move in but I really love you, and I want us to work.  Also, I slept with Killian last week.”

                “Umm, yeah, something like that.  C’mon, Em, this isn’t rocket science.  This is the woman you lo-,” Emma hit the end call button and slid the phone back into her pocket.  She paused just outside of the gate and took several deep breaths.   _This is it._   She found herself on the porch in no time, her hand outstretched, knocking on the door.  Emma waited several minutes for Regina to answer, but as time approached the five-minute mark, she decided to turn around and head home. 

                “Emma?"  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally, I had this placed in a time about 10 years after Henry finds Emma. I realized while reading over this for a 5th time, that having this set 10 years after that moment would make him about 20 years old. I doubt they would be tucking their 20 year old son into bed still, and if so, that's a completely different kind of story. Lol. So, I've decided to make Henry solely Regina's son, he is 10. Emma moved to town when we was 3, she and Regina finally admitted feelings for each other when he was 9. Sorry for the Author's note book, just trying to throw some background out there.


	2. Chapter 2

                “Do you want to sit down?” she asked from the foyer, as Emma paced the living room.  Emma shook her head, but stilled her movements.  Regina crossed the room, closing the space between them in a few strides.  “What happened to your face?”

                “I was…in a…bar fight,” Emma all but whispered, and at the raised eyebrow that she had grown so accustomed to seeing whenever she did something Regina considered idiotic, she continued, “but there’s a lot more I need to talk about before I can get to that story.  Just hear me out, okay?  Don’t…don’t freak out.  Please.”  She reached out and took Regina’s hand in hers.

                “Emma, what’s going on?”  The worry in Regina’s voice made Emma want to puke. The woman didn’t deserve anything that was about to happen.  She had been through enough. 

                “I slept with Killian.” _Yeah, just blurt it right out.  Smooth, Swan._ Regina yanked her hand away.

                “What?”

                “I panicked.  There was so much going on here, and then you asked me to move in.  I just…I don’t know how it happened.”

                “I don’t think I need to go into the whole birds and bees’ conversation with you, Miss Swan.  I believe you’re well aware how sex works.”

                “Regina, please, just give me 10 minutes to explain everything.”

                “Why?  Why should I allow you to waste anymore of my time?  Any more of my son’s time?”

                “Don’t do this.  Please.  It meant nothing.  I love you.” Emma grasped at her hands, but Regina pulled away. 

                “You love me?  I asked you to move in with us, and you practically ran out of here.  I didn’t hear from you for 2 days, didn’t see you for another 3, and somewhere in between all of that you slept with your ex-boyfriend.”

                “It sounds bad, I know.”

                “It is bad!  How can I trust you after this?”

                “Gina, please,” Emma begged.  “Just listen to me.”

Regina took a deep breath, and exhaled slowly, “I need you to leave.  I can barely stand to look at you.” Emma rushed forward, her hands grabbing hold of her arms.  “Have you lost your mind?”

                “Gina, I just need you to listen!”

                “Get the hell off of me!” Regina shoved her backwards, breaking Emma’s hold on her.  The air was thick between them.   “I don’t have anything to say to you right now, Emma.  I trusted you.  I let you into my home, let you into my son’s life, and the minute things start to get a little serious, you run.  How can I expect you to be a part of this family if whenever things get tough you disappear for weeks at a time?”

                “Okay,” Emma sighed.  “I’ll let myself out.”  She gave a parting glance over her shoulder as she exited the living room as quickly as possible.  Reaching the front door, she paused for a moment, “I’m going to make this better.  This is where I need to be, with you, with Henry.  We’re going to be a family.”


	3. Chapter 3

           “Ruby, hot chocolate is not going to solve my problem,” Emma balked as Ruby slid the cup in front of her.  She walked around town for a while after leaving Regina’s, she found herself back at the beach and finally ended at her place.   It was morning and the sun was shining before she knew it.  She dressed for work on auto-pilot, shoved her feet into her work boots and left without bothering to tie them.  She couldn’t remember falling asleep after she made it home, she might have drifted off once or twice, but majority of the night was spent on her couch trying to think of a way to fix her life.

            “Neither is alcohol, bar fights or sulking,” Ruby replied pointedly.  She grabbed a cloth and began to wipe down the counter.  “I’m your best friend, so I’m going to be a little blunt, okay?”

            “When are you anything other than that?”

Ruby rolled her eyes, “Pull your head out of your ass.  You made this mess, clean it up.  If you want to be a family with Regina, then you have got to resolve your commitment issues.”

            “I don’t have commitment issues.”

            “Sure you don’t,” Ruby tossed the cloth down and walked to the other end of the diner to take an order.  Emma lifted the hot chocolate to her mouth and took a slow sip.   She was about halfway through her cup when the bell above the door chimed.  “Morning, Regina,” Ruby called.  “Your usual coffee?”

            “To go, please.” Regina laid her money on the counter.

            “Hey,” Emma turned in her seat, a soft smile playing on her lips.

            “Not now, Miss Swan.  I have a headache.  I wasn’t able to get much sleep last night.” No matter how cold she made her voice, Emma could see the varying emotions in her eyes.

            “Yeah, I don’t think I slept at all last night.”

            “Oh? Did you find your way back into Killian’s bed?”  Ruby brought her coffee over and before Emma had a chance to respond, the brunette was gone.

            “I have to get back to the station,” Emma tossed a couple dollars down, and shoved away from the counter. 

###

            “You doing okay, Em?” David popped his head into her office.  “You looked a little off when you came in earlier.”

            “I’m tired.  I didn’t get much sleep last night.”

            “It’s a slow day, maybe you should take the rest of the day off?  Get some rest.”

            “Not entirely sure that’s going to help.”   David stepped further into the room and let the door close behind him.  He took a seat in one of the chairs in front of her desk.

            “I heard about the bar last night.”

            “Yeah, not one of my finer moments,” Emma leaned back in her chair.  Her hands tried to rub the stress from her face.  “I don’t know what the hell I was thinking.”

            “Which part?  The running from Regina part or the punching Killian’s new girlfriend in the face part?”

            “Both, I guess.  But the Regina thing…that’s really fucking with me.  I told her I loved her last night in the midst of telling her about Killian.  The first time those words have ever come out of my mouth, and I say it like it’s just supposed to band-aid our relationship back together.  How can I love her if I’m so quick to run off?” David reached across the desk as her fists came crashing down.  He squeezed one affectionately, comforting his friend as best he could.

            “Maybe you should take some time?  Leave town for a few days.  You have vacation time saved up, I can handle the paperwork.”

            “Soul searching?”

David nodded as he got to his feet. “Running isn’t always the answer, but this time, you’re running to find you.”


End file.
